Bullying of LGBTQ youth | What we can do as parents to teach compassion and understanding

In recent weeks, there have been a number of media stories on bullying of LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer) youth. In some of those cases, a kid committed suicide. The stories have helped highlight the bullying LGBTQ youth face in our schools and community. They’ve also served as a reminder of how just how strong a weapon bullying can be.

By Patti Skelton-McGougan • October 19, 2010 3:41 pm

In recent weeks, there have been a number of media stories on bullying of LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer) youth. In some of those cases, a kid committed suicide. The stories have helped highlight the bullying LGBTQ youth face in our schools and community. They’ve also served as a reminder of how just how strong a weapon bullying can be.

Such weapons are much less powerful if we act when someone bullies another. When we stand by and do nothing, we are part of the problem. When we speak up and step in, or get help for a victim, we become part of the solution. Even letting jokes pass gives people permission to go further. We have to change a culture that allows bullying and stop this weapon being used against our youth.

As parents, we can model good behavior and hold our children accountable for the harm they cause when they bully or tease another.

“Often the parents of bullies support their child’s behavior toward other children and some may even bully their child,” says Danny Hanson, violence prevention coordinator for Youth Eastside Services (YES).

LGBTQ youth in particular are often targeted by bullies. It may be one reason why they’re at higher risk of drug and alcohol use, depression and suicide. It’s best to teach compassion understanding for all people, not only those who are like us. It can literally make a life or death difference to a tormented youth.

If you know of a LGBTQ youth who is struggling, they should know that they are not alone and there are resources in the community to support them. There is a B-GLAD support program at the Redmond Firehouse Teen Center facilitated by YES counselors and most area high schools have clubs as well.

Some schools in our area also partner with YES to offer peer-to-peer education on bullying and LGBTQ issues in order to build understanding and create a safer, more accepting school environment. Studies find that students learn better when taught by their peers on these issues. If your school doesn’t have such a program, talk with a school counselor about bringing one in.

We may have differences in beliefs, but we can share a goal to build a supportive community that allows our youth to be healthy, safe and confident.

Patti Skelton-McGougan is executive director of Youth Eastside Services (YES). For more information, call 425-747-4937 or go to www.YouthEastsideServices.org.