You may have heard of a cyberbullying case in Issaquah that made national news. Two middle school students are potentially facing felony charges for bullying a classmate on Facebook. You might dismiss this as extreme, but in fact, it is much more common than most parents know.
Kids’ relationships in the real world are mirrored online. When drama erupts among a group of friends, it passes seamlessly from the lunchroom to the chat room and everyone in a social circle knows about it and often even participates via the social network.
While bullying is nothing new, when it takes place in the digital world, it’s like public humiliation on steroids. Photos and cruel comments travel in an instant and can be seen, revisited, reposted, and shared by a huge audience.
The cruelties inflicted by cyberbullying are a devastating reality for the majority of tweens and teens. A survey by i-Safe, a leading educator of online safety, found 42 percent of children in grades four through eight have been bullied by others online. And 58 percent didn’t tell their parents or another adult about it.
So What Can Parents Do?
Even vigilant parents can’t monitor their kids Facebook activity 24/7 — especially now that many kids access social media via phones. So here are some things we can do to help our kids.
Teach kids to recognize bullying for what it is — a power imbalance where a bigger, smarter or more popular kid targets another and threatens or harms them physically, financially and/or emotionally.
Make sure your child knows who they can go to if they are concerned, hurt, or need help in handling a bullying situation.
Teach empathy so your child understands the pain a comment, photo or action might cause another. Encourage them not to participate by forwarding things on, to report a bully, and to even consider flagging a cruel comment.
Help them be safe by keeping their profiles generic, not posting photos, not opening email from people they don’t know, and especially not from bullies. Also, make sure they protect their passwords.
Supervise, directly and indirectly, keeping computers in public areas in the house, talking with them about what’s happing on Facebook and being a Facebook friend so you can read posts.
It’s up to all of us to create safe schools and communities and together, we can make a difference.
Patti Skelton-McGougan is executive director of Youth Eastside Services. For more information, call 425-747-4937 or go to www.youtheastsideservices.org.
