I’ve loved movies as long as I can remember.
I still recall one of my first theater experiences, cowering in my seat as a 4-year-old — knowing any moment E.T. would spring from the foggy field to give the audience a thrill.
The big-eyed alien didn’t disappoint.
Unfortunately, the same can’t be said for Hollywood, which has evolved into one big blockbuster of bore.
As June gets underway, we are entering the summer movie season — a time that used to signal three months of bliss for film fans. Now it’s turned into a contest of who can produce the largest box of digital eye candy.
When done right, Computer-Generated Imagery, or CGI, can take viewers to places they’ve never imagined. But like most things, it only works in moderation — something Hollywood directors obviously know little about.
Want proof? Look no further than this summer’s over-the-top “Battleship.”
Don’t get me wrong. I like explosions as much as the next guy.
But I miss the days of real cars getting blown up. I miss the days of stuntmen. I miss the days when acting and dialogue were valued.
There was just something more satisfying knowing it took five pounds of TNT to blow up a limousine and not the click of a mouse. I like knowing a real person put their body on the line jumping off a rooftop. And I’d much rather listen to a skilled actor deliver a line, than Tatum Channing, or Channing Tatum, or whatever his name is, stutter one-liners while showing his abs from 50 different angles.
There wasn’t anything that disappointed me more than the 2010 big screen rendition of The A-Team, a favorite childhood television show of mine in the ‘80s. I know, it was a cheesy show, but the whole premise was based on stunts. One of the lead characters was a stuntman. There were zero stunts in the movie, but plenty of ridiculous green-screen shots — one that included a tank falling out of an airplane, shooting live ammunition, only to be saved by a parachute. Yep, that’s really going to happen.
As movie prices go up, the quality of the movies seems to go down. That’s a shame for people like me, who enjoy escaping the summer heat for the dark confines of an air-conditioned theater.
Sure, movies often provide an escape from reality, but without some semblance of physical existence they just become laughable.
Maybe aliens aren’t real, but people could actually reach out and touch E.T. on the movie set. There was no actors walking next to an imaginary alien on a green screen. And for me that makes a huge difference.
Keep it real Hollywood, or I’ll be happy to keep the money in my wallet.
Kevin Endejan is Assistant Editor of the Issaquah & Sammamish Reporter. He can be reached at kendejan@issaquahreporter.com or 425-391-0363, ext. 5054.
