Parents often wonder when they should sit their kids down to talk about drugs and alcohol. They may be surprised to learn that they should start talking as early as age 5. But I recommend an ongoing, comfortable and age-appropriate dialogue rather than a somber “Sit Down” and here’s why. 
If you’ve established an environment of openness and trust over the years, your children are much more likely to come to you later when they have questions or problems. 
On the other hand, if you wait until your child is a newly minted teen to give an intimidating, scare-tactic-like “Drug Talk,” he or she is not only less likely to share things with you, they’re also less likely to trust the information you give them. 
Why? Because they already know that drugs and alcohol can’t be all bad because of all the mixed messages they’ve already received through ads, the news media, friends and that glass of wine you had with dinner. The fact is, drugs and alcohol can make you feel really good – that’s why they’re dangerous. 
Drug use and abuse happens everywhere, even in “good neighborhoods.” That’s why five isn’t too young. Look for those “teachable moments,” gearing the level and amount of information to your child’s age. A kindergartner, for example, may be satisfied with, “Drugs can make you feel better, but they can also cause serious problems when people can’t stop taking them.” 
As your child gets older, increase the sophistication of your dialogue, making sure the information you give is balanced and accurate. An excellent resource is the National Institute of Drug Abuse Web site. The more accurate information they have, the better equipped they’ll be to make good decisions.
While more frequent, smaller conversations about drugs are recommended over one big one, that one big talk is better than none. If parents aren’t sure how to start the conversation, they might try referencing a movie or TV show in which a character uses alcohol, tobacco or other drugs. They can also talk about things happening in the news, celebrity gossip or the latest sports scandal. If you can tailor the talk to something your child is interested in, it will be easier. 
Contrary to popular thought, teens do listen to their moms and dads. Don’t be afraid to set clear boundaries and ask lots of questions: When are you coming home? Who’s the adult in charge? What’s the phone number? If you don’t like the answers, put your foot down – ‘You’re not going over there anymore.’ It may be a cliché to say, but there really is no replacement for an involved parent.

Patti Skelton-McGougan is executive director of Youth Eastside Services. Since 1968, YES has been a lifeline for kids and families, offering counseling, outreach and prevention programs to help foster strong family relationships and a safe community. For more information, call 425-747-4937 or go to the Youth Eastside Services website.